Friday, May 20, 2005

My sister came into a bit of money recently. Not crazy money, but a nice little chunk of dough. In addition to taking care of herself and her husband, she wants to do some nice things for the rest of the family. She wants to payoff my parent's car and a big chunk of their mortgage, do the same for her daughter and put away some money for college for my great-niece.

For the BF and I she wants to send us on a vacation. She called me the other day and said she was all ready to set us up for a week in Ft. Lauderdale. She read somewhere that that was a gay "hot spot", so she looked into it and decided that's where she wanted to send us. Her plan is to set us up at The Grand Resort and Spa for a week. Looks pretty sweet to me. An "all-male" spa - a gym, massages, hot tub, pool, scrubs, facials, etc. I haven't had a real vacation in almost a year. I'm definitely ready for something like that.

But I think we're going to say "Thanks, but we can't." My sister didn't come into THAT much money, and she really needs it. She needs to take care of herself and her family first. It's very nice of her to take care of our parents. My folks supported her for quite a few years when things weren't going so well for her. Quite frankly, she really should pay them back for some of that. My parents aren't exactly loaded. My niece and her husband just had a daughter a couple years ago, and things are tight for them too. They could really use the help.

But the BF and I don't really need the money. We're both doing well and can afford to pay for everything we need. It's an incredibly nice offer, but I'd feel bad taking the money from my sister, when I know she's really going to need it down the line. Maybe a few years from now (when I'm convinced she's going to invest it properly and it's not going to run out), I'll take her up on her offer. But for now I think I really need to say "no."

I'm incredibly touched though. The fact that she thought enough to specifically research a popular "gay" location to the point that she's found a nice spa for us was a big surprise to me. It's not like they have lots of gay-knowledgeable friends to ask their opinions. She definitely had to go out of her way to find this place. And it's always nice when my family makes it a point to include my BF and our relationship into consideration.

It would have been very easy for my sister to find a typical resort anywhere in the country. It would have been just as nice a gesture. But the fact that she specifically sought out a gay resort means a lot to me. I have no doubt my family loves the BF, but I'm also aware that they're still not 100% comfortable with the whole gay thing. Then again, maybe this shows they're more comfortable with it than I thought.

Still, as much as I'd like to accept it, I can't. She needs to hang on to her money. I'd feel like I was taking advantage of her, and I don't want to do that. The BF agrees. Besides - I'd feel extra guilty having my sister paying for our debauchery when we're on vacation. hehe.

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